This week holds special meaning for me and my family as Sean and I celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary on the 6th of May (although we've had 37 years together). Reaching this milestone has prompted a lot of reflection—not just on the joys and wins—but also on the mistakes, missteps, and lessons we've learned along the way.

It struck me how the challenges of maintaining a marriage are very similar to the hurdles we face on our wellness journeys. Both paths are filled with highs and lows, lapses and rebounds. And both teach us that success often isn't about getting everything right the first time; it's about recognising the mistakes, learning from them, and persevering.

Whether it's relationships with partners, friends, family, or yourself, the truth is, there's no perfect roadmap. But through trial and error, we uncover what works, adjust where needed, and keep going. And if you've been on and off the "wellness wagon," as many of us have, I hope my reflections offer some encouragement today.

The Common Missteps of Wellness and Relationships

Looking back on 30 years of marriage and my wellness journey, I've noticed that some of the biggest mistakes are rooted in the same struggles.

1. Chasing Perfection: Early in our marriage, I made the mistake of expecting everything to go smoothly all the time. I fell into the same trap with wellness—I expected perfect workouts, flawless nutrition, and immediate results. But just like relationships, wellness isn't about perfection; it's about consistency, resilience, and continuing to show up when things aren't perfect.
2. Neglecting Communication (and Self): There were times when Sean and I forgot how vital it is to really listen to each other. Similarly, I know I've ignored what my body and mind were trying to tell me when life got busy. Ignoring these "warning signals" leads to problems in both areas.
3. Ignoring the Small Things: I've learned that the little things carry the most weight. A kind word, a handwritten note, a shared laugh… they're all like "micro wins" in a relationship. The same applies to wellness. I spent too long thinking only grand gestures mattered when, in fact, it's the small daily habits that create long-term health.
4. Forgetfulness in Prioritisation: Sometimes, we put other commitments ahead of each other or our own wellbeing. That's a quick way to strain relationships and milestones on your wellness path.

A Metaphor That Might Help

Imagine a wellness routine or a meaningful relationship as a mosaic. Each choice, whether thoughtful or mistaken, is a piece of the larger picture. Some days, the tiles fit perfectly; other days, they chip or don't align as you'd hoped.

But with patience and a willingness to keep going, even the mistakes add texture and depth. When you step back over time, all those tiny, imperfect pieces combine to create something beautiful and unique. And the best part? The mosaic isn't fixed. You can keep adding to it, refining it, and shaping it into something that reflects who you are and where you want to go.

Mistakes I've Learned to Avoid

Through trial and error, these are the lessons I'm holding onto in both wellness and relationships that you might find helpful, too:

• Avoid Focusing Only on End Goals: Marriage isn't just the wedding day. Your wellness isn't just about reaching a target weight or running a marathon. It's about the ongoing process.
• Don't Go It Alone (When You Don't Have To): Whether it's a trusted partner, a friend, or a mentor, having someone by your side can provide perspective and support. And for those moments you are solo, lean into your own strength and inner dialogue as your guide.
• Steer Clear of All-or-Nothing Thinking: Whether it was assuming one argument spelt disaster or one skipped workout meant failure, I've learned to view both relationships and wellness as journeys, not pass/fail tests.

Tips for Getting Back On Track

Here are some steps that might resonate with you, especially if you've felt "off track," whether in wellness or in cultivating meaningful relationships:

• Start Small: Choose one habit to focus on, like a 10-minute walk or a small kind gesture. Little things compound over time.
• Pause Instead of Criticising: Offer yourself grace when you slip up. Your future self deserves patience as much as your partner, friends, and family do.
• Set Realistic Expectations: Relationships take work. Fitness takes work. Both require balance, not burnout. Find the manageable rhythm that works for you.
• Celebrate the Wins: Did you drink more water today? Did you take five minutes to connect with a loved one? That's progress worth acknowledging.

Final Thoughts

When I look back on my marriage, I see not just the highlights but the struggles that taught us the most. They've forced us to adapt, grow, forgive, and find joy in the moments between. It's the same with wellness. Slip-ups remind us what matters. They're not the end but an opportunity to reframe, learn, and keep moving forward.

Success, whether in relationships or health, isn't a straight path. It's a beautifully chaotic collection of lessons and micro-decisions formed over time, proving it's never too late to begin again.

This week, I encourage you to ask yourself:

• Where have I been too hard on myself or others?
• What small habit, kind gesture, or mindful act can I add to my day?
• How can I reframe my mistakes not as failures but as lessons?

I hope these insights remind you that even the rockiest paths can lead somewhere remarkable with time and intention.

Until next time, cheering you on to wellness success

Katie x